An Open Letter To The Last Boy

Dear Boy

I've been crushing on the opposite sex since I was 5 years old. FIVE. Now I am almost 27. In the last 21 years I have cried over them for various reasons - they moved away, they liked other girls, they liked other girls and me at the same time but liked them better, but mostly because they did not know I existed.

And you should also know that from that long list (including the ones who have shown their interest in dating me) I've considered only THREE men for, you know, long-haul purposes. So that's 21 years divided by 3...1 guy for every 7 years. Like an admission letter, I am pleased to announce that you have been one of the candidates that made the cut.

So when you chose to let me down...gently...by saying (you perhaps lost interest in me because) I was "too easily pleased" (amongst other perfectly logical reasons), I have to admit, I was quite dumbfounded! Now that I've recovered, I can write this Open Letter because I can't possibly risk anything (barring a little pride)

Dating somebody for two months and considering them for the long haul? Yeah, I guess you're right, I AM too easily pleased.

There's a lot that didn't happen in those months, but there's a lot that did. Like, Gchatting the whole day, leading to endless phone conversations, not to mention text messages that made me smile to no end. You know how they say some pains are good pains? Yeah, that was my jaw for a whole month. My finely cemented walls came crumbling down so fast, I very blushingly embarrassed myself.

Never in my whole life has anyone fussed so much over my birthday! You were restless, trying to figure me out in that short span so you could throw a grand gesture...which you did. I know it wasn't "grand" for you but it was to me, because no one ever did anything like that for me, ever. You could've excluded the cooking and guitar playing, and it would've been just as good.

I shudder to think what bitches your previous girlfriends have been to you that they didn't appreciate your smallest attention to detail. But you clearly liked to be treated that way and not "Look! Here's a girl who's easily pleased. This is great!" I forgot, that after all, you're a guy and nothing is more important than a well-done chase sequence. But babe, I'm 27 and so very tired of games.

The fact that you wanted to get to know me outdoors as much as you wanted to discover me indoors, well that's just wrong! The fact that seeing you care about your family the way you do made me care about mine..well, that's just preposterous! The fact that you didn't want to push me against the wall while making out, because my head could be hit hard, that's just unheard of! The fact that you respect a rickshawwallah, a waiter that fucked up the order and a successful company CEO the same way, I'm sorry that's just inappropriate. I must be dreaming, this "I've learnt so much from you" & "You make me a better person" happens only in movies.

I've met plenty people in my life who are ambitious, talk big, and then present excuses for not doing them (that includes me) I haven't known you for long but I know you will never back down from what you've set out to do, however lofty it all might sound. THAT makes you incredibly hot. When you giggle like a little 10 year old while watching South Park, that just drives me insane with adoration. How could I not have exclaimed to myself "Where was this guy all my life?!?!" The fact that you still somewhere feel guilty about the way things ended with us...well, don't.

You took my imaginary checklist, ticked almost everything in it, scribbled some extra things down, made it into a ball and hit it out of the park. Yes, I was too easily pleased. And I can turn around and say "Hah! Your loss" but from where I see it, it's clearly mine.

But wait...No! I'm NOT too easily pleased. Can't you see? You're just that damn good.